Shelley is worried about her financial situation. He has a home business that looks promising but is still largely production and credit card bills begin to accumulate. He takes the paper need to look at the ads, think about doing some 'marketing for your home business, the wonder that is the best course of action or whether it should do both, and then decides to have a cigarette and clean the house.
Sam has marital problems. His wife left the marriage, not only emotionally, but she has moved out of the house. He knows more and wants to find a new love and get on with life, but he is concerned about the financial consequences if the files for divorce. Picks up the phone to call a lawyer, is put on hold, and decide which is the best time to go sailing on his catamaran.
"The exercise will be good for me," he says to himself. "Taking these extended wings is getting me in good shape. What if I take another 3 days off? "
Antony has no idea what to do with retirement. People keep saying how lucky he is to be able to retire, but he does not see it that way. It 'a concern after another trying to figure out what to do with himself and how to pass the time. Has a nagging suspicion his coach's personal life was something in every suggestion that has, particularly on his self-esteem of being attacked only to his profession and its need to develop their emotional intelligence and start building the next stage of his life.
Ebook takes you sent him and read something about authenticity. "This is always on my nerves," he says to himself, and his thoughts wander to his mistress. His hand grabs the phone.
Each of these people are addicted to something that will stall out. The activity varied choice, in their case nicotine, physical activity and compulsive sex, but the real source of the problem is their dependence on worrying. Dependence gives you something to do when the concern grows. And 'action, but it is spinning, do not go somewhere.
A dependency can be something that is bad for physical health as cigarettes or drugs, in which case it is a stretch of rationalization, or may be something good for your physical health, such as jogging or boating, in which If it is easy to rationalize and you'll also get the positive affirmation from others. However, any approach to addiction is bad for your total well-being - the physical, emotional, spiritual and mental.
Addictive pursuits give us something to do that relieves tension, but is not doing what needs to be done to address the situation. Fills time and provides "busy-ness", but when it's over, returns to worry because the problem was not addressed. It 'an abuse of emotional intelligence to consider that the activity did you "feel good" So does cocaine, temporarily. Feel good as a state of being requires addressing the problems and solve them.
When Shelley had nicotine and clean the house, you still face what to do with his financial situation because it's done nothing but avoid it. Sam returns from another flight of 3 days on a sailing boat tanned and muscled and he will still be trapped in an unresolved situation that is sapping his power. Antonio has a great evening with his latest lover, who has his mind off his problems, but is only temporary, no euphoria, the same that you've taken care of business and your life is in order. At the end of their time out, you feel worse about themselves and their situation for doing it.
Emotional Intelligence starts with self-awareness. Take a look at what you do when you start to worry and get feedback outside, such as coaching. It 's a realistic concern? You made a plan to address the causes of it? You have taken the first step, which is the most difficult? You got the emotional side of it run?
Worry is a waste of time and treating it with an employment or a substance is adding insult to injury. Will always be easier in the short term to ruminate and then grab a piece of chocolate or numb the mind with alcohol, but in the long run you'll end up with a new problem on top of the old one. If you recognize this as a template in your life, you're ready to try something different?
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